Oct. 20, 2021

Solo Parenting Seasons and How To Get Through Them

Even if our partners normally pull their weight, sooner or later most of us end up in a “solo parenting” season. Here’s how to deal with those extra-intense times, plus how to prevent the “non-integrated spouse” thing becoming the default reality.

"Solo parenting" isn't the same as single parenting– but when we're in it, it can sure feel pretty intense. Even if our partners are great at pulling their own weight, sooner or later most of us end up in a solo parenting season.

Our listener Michelle emailed us to say:

Can we talk about what parenting looks like when it feels almost single-handed? We all know how ridiculously demanding full-time jobs can be nowadays. Statistics show half of the population work more than 45 hours a week. How can a parent deal with feeling overwhelmed by all the parenting demands that ought to be shared by two parents– because one's partner, not by choice, has to work instead of parent?

It's worth doing the hard work of talking about it and pushing back against the default reality of the "non-integrated spouse." In this episode we discuss

  • how to deal with the resentment (pro tip: block the traveling spouse on social media)
  • how to lower your expectations during these seasons
  • how to push against "solo parenting" as a default setting even when the other parent is actually home
  • how asychronous communication can really help


Here are links to some of the things we discuss on this episode:


and our own episodes:

Fresh Take: Whitnee Hawthorne On Strategies For Working Moms

Dividing the Workload

Changing the Invisible Workload (with guest Eve Rodsky)


Special thanks to this month's sponsors:

Betterhelp Start taking charge of your mental health– no matter where you live! Go to betterhelp.com/fresh to get 10% off your first month of counseling. 

Expressable is an online speech therapy company that has helped thousands of children of all ages reach their communication goals. Speak with a speech-language pathologist for free today and learn more about your child's communication development at expressable.io/fresh.

Home Made Podcast is a new podcast about… home. And what happens when you open that door and step into a new world, whether that’s a house, apartment or neighborhood. Find out more and listen HERE.

Jane.com is a boutique marketplace featuring the latest in women’s fashion, accessories, home decor, children’s clothing, and more. By shopping at jane.com, you support small businesses, 1500 of which are women-owned. And you will not believe the prices! Visit jane.com/laughing.

KiwiCo projects make science, technology, engineering, art, and math super fun– and best of all, kids of all ages can work on them independently! Get 50% off your first month plus FREE shipping on ANY crate line with the code MOTHERHOOD at kiwico.com

Magic Spoon is breakfast cereal that gets protein into your kids’ breakfast- Go to magicspoon.com/FRESH to grab a custom bundle of cereal and try it today! And be sure to use our promo code FRESH at checkout to save five dollars off your order! 

MamaZen is a revolutionary solution for motherhood burnout, anxiety, impatience, and more. Download MamaZen today– and use the code "FRESH" to unlock a free trial!

Prose is the healthy hair regimen with your name all over it! Get 15% off your first order today! Go to prose.com/laughing

SuperBeets Heart Chews are a tasty treat that give you the energy you need and are good for you. Get FREE shipping and returns plus a FREE 30-day supply with your first purchase at SuperBeets.com/fresh.

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices