May 29, 2023

Ask Margaret: My Kid Is Afraid of Storms

How do we calm our kids' fears about storms, floods, fires, and tornadoes? Here's how to help your kids process scary things in an honest way.

What do we do when our kids ask us to explain scary things like natural disasters, accidents, and bad news?

A listener in our Facebook group asks:

"My 5yo is afraid of naturally occurring phenomena. Natural disasters like floods, tornadoes, hurricanes. I try to explain these things very matter-of-factly but she would continue with questions for days. “Do we get tornadoes?” “Would a flood come to our house?”

If we are watching a show and someone injures themselves she would ask about what happened for days. “Mommy, what happened to that man? Why was he bleeding? Was he breathing? Why was his arm like that?”

I realized these are very different situations but they all fuel some kind of anxiety in her. Does anyone else have a kid(s) dealing with these kinds of emotions? How can I help reassure her that she is safe and other people are safe when bad things happen to them?"

Margaret says it's best to answer the question actually being asked— like "Is a flood coming to our house?" —rather than overexplaining natural disasters in general. Be honest with your kids about the nature of dangerous things, and be present with them. Ultimately what your kids really want is to process their feelings with you, their safe space.

Lyra Fontaine for Seattle Children's Hospital: Helping Kids Cope with Anxiety Over Distressing News

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