Are you the “bad parent” in your home? The enforcer of bedtimes, the stern shusher in the church pew? Or are you the “good parent,” more likely to agree that time is a construct and that ice cream not only can, but should, be what’s for dinner?
Are you the “bad parent” in your home? The enforcer of bedtimes, the keeper of deadlines, the stern shusher in the church pew?
Or are you the “good parent,” the authority figure more likely to agree that time is a construct and that ice cream not only can, but should, be what’s for dinner?
This week we’re breaking down
- how this dynamic plays out in each of our homes
- whether the primary caregiver has to always be stuck with the Killer of Joy role
- how this can play out when parents are divorced
- how drill sergeants can ease up on the oversight
- how the “good time Charlies” can become more aware
As in most things, change is possible when we watch our stories. These aren’t roles that have to harden in amber and then never change. The Carrier of the Diaper Bag and The Worrier of All Potential Outcomes deserves to kick back once in a while too.
Here are links to some of the writing on this subject that we discuss in this episode:
Isaac Watts’ poem “Love Between Brothers and Sisters”
Julia Austin for Madame Noire: How The Good Cop/Bad Cop Parenting Dynamic Ruins Marriages
Megan Glosson for moms.com: Why 'Good Cop, Bad Cop' Parenting Ultimately Hurts Everyone
James Lehman for Empowering Parents: Good Cop/Bad Cop Parenting
this clip from the movie The Great Santini
and our episode Parenting as a Team
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